"I would rather be what God chose to make me than the most glorious creature that I could think of; for to have been thought about, born in God’s thought, and then made by God, is the dearest, grandest, and most precious thing in all thinking." -C.S. Lewis

Apparently people say that C.S. Lewis should not be credited for this quote, but I love that man. So I'm keeping it out of spite... I just thought this was exactly how I would summarize my decision to serve a mission. Several of you know I did not absolutely NEVER IN MY LIFE want to serve a mission. But more on that in a minute...

My time as a full-time missionary seems so quick and yet so long. I loved it! It was HANDS DOWN the hardest thing I have ever done physically, spiritually and emotionally. But I came to love this little island and its people.

First off, let me introduce you to my other halves while I was out there. As an LDS missionary, you always have a companion 24/7. And while I thought it would be awful because I am an introvert, it turned out to be really wonderful. Let me introduce you:

 Hmas. Mapa (Tonga/California), Jensen (Texas) and Flores (Guatemala), Lastra (Mexico), Olvera (Mexico), Alonzo (Honduras) and Fife (Alaska) 

Hnas. Ortiz (Peru), Nazaire (Bahamas), Quezada (DR), Polando (DR), Pereira (Brasil)

So these are the women that helped me through it. Each of them helped me in ways that I will never be able to thank them. They were all inspired and helped me with each one of my weaknesses. I always had a companion for specific reasons that only Heavenly Father could have known and directed my mission president to put us together. However, I want to share a special shoutout to my mission mom. When you come to the mission, your first companion is your trainer and you call her your mom. And my mission mom, Hermana Mapa was an absolute angel. I am sure it was hard to train my "beginning of the mission" me, but her happy, stress-free attitude set the course of my mission. I will forever be grateful to be her 'daughter.'

Yep. She looks like a fly Tongan and I look like an idiot. But I love her. 

She came to Colorado for the weekend!! We look a lot better now that we're not sweating! 

So in short, best experience I've ever had.I learned a lot. I made a list my last free day on my mission of the things I learned, but the list keeps on getting longer even after the mission. And while I know there are new adventures waiting for me, I certainly loved this year and a half, life-changing experience. Amo la Republica Dominicana!! I wish I could write more about what my experience was but it's just too hard to be brief! :)

I just want to share a quick story as an example of how great the Heavenly Father's love is perfect. Most of the time, I share stories about incredible miracles that happened in other people's lives on my mission. And there are several. I will write so much more about their experiences later. But I want to share something really personal that only a few people knew about when it happened. Several people have told me that I just "look happier" or "brighter" and I want to explain how that happened. I remember the exact date: July 7,2015. A situation happened where the most perfect investigator my companion and I had did not receive permission to get baptized. I FLIPPED OUT. I don't mean like just mad but it was a testimony trying moment. I did not fall asleep until late into the evening. I woke up and just felt terrible. I asked myself, what's the point? I then began questioning everything I had come to know over the past 10 months about families. I told my companion, who LUCKILY was sick that day, I didn't believe it. I didn't believe that families could be together. It was all just a cruel joke and I couldn't believe that I had wasted my last 10 months as a missionary and nearly 23 years of my life on this. I told her I was taking off my plaque and going home. I was calling my mission president and I was going to be on a flight direct to Colorado. I had a pity party that my parents had been divorced. I cried and whined for about 30 minutes. So basically, the classic dramatic and negative Kelsey Davis the world had known before I served a mission. And she looked at me, and said, "Hermana Davis, you know better. I am not going to listen to you complaining about your family life any longer. Your family is sealed and you were born into the covenant. Some of these people we are teaching may never have the privilege of being with their family in the temple in this lifetime. I need you to pull yourself together so we can go save Dominican families today." I was shocked. No one had ever been so direct or bold with me. It was one of those tough love moments. I got even more upset and walked out of our bedroom. Since it was just the two of us, I walked into the kitchen. I knelt down and said a prayer. And I just felt this tiny impression that I needed to focus on the wonderful things that had come from being a member. I started a list and by the time I was done, the list took up the whole page. I realized how many great things had come because of my parents originally getting married and sealed in the temple. I was so happy for my companion's advice and even though things were not perfect, she helped me to feel more at peace with the situation. 

And then this happened:

Yep my soul sister companion (side note: I originally did not want to be her companion, which we always laugh about now), made me get over myself. She made me walk to the "mountains" and drink a batida (these delicious mango smoothie things Dominicans make). It was so inspired and then a few hours later, we received permission for this investigator to be baptized. What started off as one of the worst days of my mission had become one of the best. But that's not where this story ends.

A days later, after our investigator's baptism, I was transferred. And a week later, we had a leadership meeting. It was my first one, and I was a bit nervous. I had asked President for a blessing because I was still having residual feelings of anger about families, which he indicated he would give to me after the meeting because it needed to be started right then. Then, my mission president started talking about eternal families and relating a bunch of neat things to Isaiah 3. We talked about the effects when society does not make families a building block in its structure. I felt the overwhelming presence of the Spirit testifying to me what I already knew: families are forever. And while we may not see in our current lives how it works out, it does. And then I had another prompting: one of the reasons I had to come and serve a mission was to learn how to become a defender of the family. Una defensora de la familia. The spirit was so strong and poignant that I ended up bursting into tears. I will forever be grateful for that moment. I've always heard of having clear impressions from the Spirit, but I have never had that clear of an impression in my entire life. I don't know how I ended up in that exact meeting only a week later after this experience, but I do know that I had an inspired mission president. (Who,by the way, still gave me a blessing afterward, not knowing he had already given me comfort) A few months after that, I had an interview with my mission president. He had not known about all my specific struggles, but he did know that my testimony about families took a long time to develop. It was a year to the day exactly that I had entered the mission field. Peace and love filled my mind as we talked about how much I had changed my opinion about families being forever. I could testify with ease and love that families are forever and that Heavenly Father has a divine purpose for each of us. I am so grateful for righteous priesthood leaders that have helped me before, during and after my mission to help find my inner best self and for blessings that have provided immense comfort and direction.

President Corbitt and I! 

I am so grateful for this inspired man, Hermana Alonzo, and all of my companions who helped me along the way, but especially my Heavenly Father for inspiring me to serve a mission.

To me, the greatest miracle that happened on my mission was who I became. Before my mission, I was a dark and twisty person. I listened to sad music and focused on all the wrong things.  I loved dark colors and darkness.Not spiritual darkness, but just the negativity that comes with it. I always focused on my problems and what my needs were and how unfair life had become. My mission helped me to "live in the sunshine," like my new blog quote says. So maybe, I'm not walking across Georgetown's beautiful campus with my master's degree, but I have something of infinite more worth: a knowledge that families are forever and that Heavenly Father loves us so perfectly! And that is why my countenance is brighter and I am a happier person. My new scripture from my mission is D&C 50: 25 " You may know the truth, that you may chase darkness from among you."  I am so so so happy that God is making me and that He inspired me to serve a mission even when everything seemed to be leading me to Washington DC. Everyone was shocked when I announced I was going on a mission instead of heading to grad school. But, it was the BEST decision I have ever made thus far. I am also so happy that He stills guides me today even though I am not a full-time missionary anymore. I sincerely hope to be "born in God's thought" and become the person He needs me to be right now. I hope that someday I get to explain all of this to my children. But until that happens, I will just have the faith that everything can and will work out the way it needs to to become the daughter of God I need to be. I know that miracles exist and that the atonement is real. Without it, I would not be able to be here today, testifying that families are forever and that Heavenly Father has an individual plan. I love the people I served with, served under and taught. All these people served me a lot more than I ever served them.They will be forever engrained in my brain as people who met me when I had finally accepted the light. And now, I am onto new adventures, back to DC for my grad school, just a few two short years behind when I had originally planned. God's plan is perfect!