" We do not have to become heroes overnight. Just a step at a time, meeting each thing that comes up, seeing it as not as dreadful as it appears, discovering that we have the strength to stare it down.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt

I absolutely love Eleanor and I can't wait for the opportunity to meet her in the next life. This has honestly been one of the most stressful, emotionally imbalanced semesters of my life and this quote was my mantra because I realized that things are "not as dreadful as it appears." This semester brought a lot of changes in my personal life. Friends got married. Some left on missions. I learned how to be, at least how it felt at the time, completely and utterly alone. My brother left to serve a mission for two years. I now have two separate houses in Colorado. I applied, got accepted and then denied to Ukraine. I applied to grad school. I made new friends. I climbed to the top of an 11,000 ft. mountain, something I did not believe was possible. I figured out why I am an English major. I became enamored with Spanish. I learned to be vulnerable and accept help. I learned to believe in true, eternal love again. I realized there are angels this side of heaven that come in all forms. I became closer and relied on my Savior, allowing Him to become a friend. I was refined and can't wait to become more diamond-like in the future ;)  But most importantly, here's something I recently realized: you're not made into an incredible person if you don't have exceedingly trying circumstances. Think of all the people you admire. Did they pass through hard times? Do I really want an easy life? Aren't all the greatest people those who have faced the greatest adversity with faith and strength? I've always believed I'm extraordinary, but how do I become more extraordinary? Sitting around, leading an easy life? I don't think so. I'm reminded of President Eyring's talk, "Mountains to Climb." Without these "mountains" in our life, who is to say we'd end up half as amazing as we nearly all do? So today, at the end of this crazy semester, I just want to say thank you for my trials. After being involved with my Model UN, I've realized I have it pretty easy compard to so many other women around the world. 

In Elder Holland's talk None Were With Him, he mentions a profound point: "Brothers and sisters, one of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of theHoly Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said: “I will not leave you comfortless: [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you].” 

I loved this! The truth is, even through one of the most emotionally challenging times of my life, there WAS someone who knew exactly how I felt. He knew what it felt like to start sobbing in the RB hallway during the passing period. He knew what it felt like to say goodbye to some of my closest friends for a few years. He felt my sorrow at my personal family situation. He felt my happiness of completing the taxing task of climbing Mt. Timp. He felt my extreme joy when I realized there WERE tons of people that loved me and helped me along. Isn't it so comforting that we have a permanent best friend? 

Well to sum up my grand standing, I'll just quote another boss woman's words, "My world has changed, but I have not." Yes, that is Malala, who was shot in the head by the Taliban for wanting an education. Comparatively speaking, I have a pretty incredible life. I am so blessed. 

Now onto what's been going on in my life recently: 

Wild. So I read this incredible memoir about this woman who decided to hike the Pacific Crest Trail by herself. I loved her honesty and a lot of the things she wrote about, specifically about how she conquered her fear and things she couldn't believe she would do. Here are some of my favorite quotes from it: 

"Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave."

“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you'll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you'll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.” 

"I wasn't out here to keep myself from having to say I am not afraid. I'd come, I'd realized, to stare that fear down, to stare everything down, really -- all that I'd done to myself and all that had been done to me. I couldn't do that while tagging along with someone else.” 

“Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can't cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It's just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal.” 

One Direction dance party. When I was sitting at my apartment during Thanksgiving, ALL ALONE, it was great because I FaceTimed with my mom, siblings and also my dad during multiple points. My favorite was when Laurel, Colin and I FaceTimed a dance party. They played music in the background (mostly One Direction!) and we danced like we were in the same room, singing to each other. I'm so grateful for technology! 

Olive Garden, cupcakes and Les Mis. A couple of Saturdays ago, Ellie, Linds and I had a perfect night. We treated ourselves to a zillion breadsticks and a delicious meal at Olive Garden and then went to get cupcakes from my favorite bakery here in Provo. Then we watched Les Mis. As much as that movie is very sad, I absolutely love it. It was such a perfect evening. 

Thanksgiving/ FaceTime. Thanksgiving came and I was feeling quite sorry for myself. I thought I was independent enough to refuse people's offers to come to their house for dinner. So I worked on my paper, planning on eating my frozen Turkey Pot pie. Luckily for me, (tender mercy alert!) one of the girls from my building at work, Aimee, noticed that I was home and invited me to their ward Thanksgiving party. It was a perfectly timed invite!! I am so thankful that she invited me so I could have some company at least on this holiday. I am so thankful for her service and loving nature. I then got to FaceTime with my mom's side of the family, so that was super fun because it was like I was there. 

Eating at the hospital. You're probably thinking, what the heck is this and why is it a separate category? Well it's because apparently eating at the hospital is a cool thing to do here and I've never done it. It's been on my bucket list and Kevin and I finally went during a lunch break at work. It was like real- life Grey's Anatomy people. There were people in scrubs saying doctory things and the food was surprisingly good. I'm just glad that Kevin put up with me because I was super excited about it. (Yep, I'm a weirdo, so I'm glad my co-workers still hang out with me!) 

Be a fountain, not a drain. Every year around this time, I come up with a new goal. This next year's goal is embodied in this phrase; I am going to work harder at complaining less and instead focusing on being proactive to achieve my goals. 

Book of Mormon. I have officially read 30 pages of the Book of Mormon in Spanish! Can I just tell you how humbling it is to read the scriptures in another language? It has literally taken me 2 1/2 weeks to read that many pages! But I love it. It's incredible to read something in a different language because you are getting a different perspective. I would recommend everyone who has the opportunity to read anything in another language because it has been a great experience! 

This expert advice. Read this article if you have a chance:  http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2012/06/15/fatherly-advice-letters/. It's all advice from fathers and I found it really tender. There are some really fantastic, succinct pieces of advice. 

Temple Square Excursion. One of my favorite things in the world, even on a regular day is Temple Square, so you can imagine my joy when they put lights on everything. I LOVE seeing the lights at Temple Square and it signals to me that Christmas is actually coming, which, during finals week, is always a struggle to remember. So Ellie, Marisa, Linds and I ate a quick bite at Chipotle (which was quick because I ate so quickly!) and then headed up to SLC. Though it was freezing, I loved it! There is not quite like the spirit you feel when you're standing on Temple Square during the Christmas spirit. We went to the top floor of the Joseph Smith building and got a great view of the whole square. It was so perfect! Then we went to Starbucks, where I discovered the existence of Egg Nog steamers. I may or may not be in love with this drink! I WANT MORE. Then, while we were driving home, we decided to try and find the house from the show Sister Wives because Ellie, Linds and Marisa love the show. After a quick Google search, we were in Lehi where we found their house. We felt creepy, but accomplished! So pretty much, it was the most perfect, magical, weirdest night in history. Perfect for the week before finals! :) 

Bridal Showers. As many of you know, my roommate Marisa and my best friend, Madison, are both getting married and I am a bridesmaid in both of their weddings. So I had the opportunity to plan and give a bridal shower. They were my two guinea pigs, but I absolutely loved planning it. I made cupcakes and planned activities and made playlists. I became quite the hostess. :) I'm sure I'll be able to tune my skills in the next few months because literally everyone is getting married! 

Mt Timp. Temple. Yesterday, I went with Madison and Mitch (her fiance) to the Mt. Timp temple because the Provo temple is closed. It's probably the last time Madison and I will ever do baptism together, which is so weird! It was really funny because we were both really confused about the flow of things were happening. The temple workers laughed at us a lot, probably because we're 21 years old and have been doing this for over 10 years and we just couldn't figure it out. It was so fun to go to a new temple and to go with my best friend one last time! SO thankful for temples and the peace it brings to my life. 

So that's an updated on my life. And now here are some pictures of my life recently: 

Michal and I outside the Vancouver temple. 

Ellie, Linds and marisa and I at temple square!

I love temple square, especially at Christmas. 

Love these ladies!

Roomie photo!

View from the Joseph Smith Building. SO GORGEOUS. 

Marisa's bridal shower!

Madison's bridal shower. 

Lindsey, Ellie and Marisa outside the Sister Wives' house. 

Laurel, Colin and I had a Facetime dance party to 1D!

 If you got to the end of this, I give you five gold starts. So that's it. Merry Christmas everyone! Love you all! 

P.S. My current obsession (i.e. my motivation for finals) is this song: 

“When everything seems to be going against you, remember that the airplanes take off against the wind, not with it.”- Henry Ford

Man, I am so glad for this Henry Ford quote because it's been a rough couple of weeks. I've been so busy with so many things in addition to some personal disappointments, that it got a little sketch for a bit. But, like another great man has stated, (i.e. President Uchtdorf, because who else would it be?) " We have seasons in our lives as well. Some are warm and pleasant. Others are not. Some of the days in our lives are as beautiful as pictures in a calendar. And yet there are days and circumstances that cause heartache and may bring into our lives deep feelings of despair, resentment, and bitterness. I am sure at one time or another we have all thought it would be nice to take up residence in a land filled only with days of picture-perfect seasons and avoid the unpleasant times." I love this. One of my old blog posts was about embracing the current season of your life. Here's the thing about seasons. They all have good parts. Without winter, we would never be able to witness the miracle of snow and hot chocolate and Christmas. The other key thing to it is that it eventually changes and how comforting that idea is! Now onto some things that are happening in my life right now: 

Finishing Grad Apps. Guys, I officially submitted my online portion of my grad school applications!!!! It was by far the most exciting part of the week because the only thing I have left is the nasty GRE, but we won't focus on that now. Here's the joyous moment caught on film:

GRAD SCHOOL HERE I COME!

The Kelsey Marie Davis Manifesto. So I've read a lot recently and I've decided I need to declare a few beliefs of mine to the world: 

1. I believe in the power of one. I believe one person can change not only communities, but countries and the world with enough determination. You might think that's naive or cheesy, but I just don't. 
2. I believe in traveling to find yourself. 
3. I believe in embracing fear. Or, as Eleanor Roosevelt once stated, "You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. Do the thing you think you cannot do." 
4. I believe in mental health days where you don't do anything but watch movies and eat junk food.
5. I believe that some people are doers and there are people who are sayers. Choose carefully when you're deciding whether you want someone in your life. 
6. I believe everyone has their own kind of fun. My version is reading a book in pajamas or watching a cheesy period drama, and there's nothing wrong about that. 
7. I believe that books, tv shows, songs, and movies can heal something about you that people can't. 
8. I believe in true love. Like cheesy true love songs and movies. And I'm not even sorry/ 
9. I believe things aren't random. Sometimes you're having a really crappy week and then Katy Perry AND Taylor Swift release new music. 
10. I believe in hard work and I believe that hard work ultimately pays off. 

These are just some of my things that I feel like I need to get off my chest. So that's my current manifest to the world. 

The moment I realized I am a senior in college. I officially registered for my last semester of college. And even though I have to take 18 credits of only English, I could not be happier. I cannot wait to officially be a college graduate and feel proud of myself for making it through four years of Provo! :) 
UKRAINE- So I applied to Ukraine and got in!!! Yay, right?!? But right after I got accepted, I got really sick to my stomach. I blew it off for a few days until the feeling came back. I was like 80% thinking that I was going to choose not to go when I got an email that said they were FULL for Ukraine. So even though it's totally and completely sad, I'm glad that I was prepared for this before I found out officially. 
Mason. So this past Wednesday I rented a car and picked Mason up from the airport. We went to Walmart to pick up a new alarm and then headed for his last American meal- In-n-Out. It was great to be with him for a few hours before I had to drop him off. We took a bunch of cute pictures and then we pulled up to the MTC where there was a zillion 'host' missionaries waiting to guide him into the MTC. It did my heart good to see someone already taking care of my brother. I AM SO PROUD OF HIM!!! I hope he's been doing well because he is such a boss. 
Saturday craziness. Sometimes you get really hyper with a few people (who shall remain nameless) and you go up to the mountains with little slips of paper with the names of all the boys who have hurt you or made you mad and you throw them into them into the wind. And it's the most liberating thing. I recommend this to everyone. 
Halloween. So we did not do anything autumny the whole month of October, so Linds found this Halloween cruise thing. We pull up, buy some delicious hot chocolate, and then float down the Provo river. It sounds pretty weird, but it was really cool because there were tons of carved pumpkins and it was just so fall. I loved every second of it. Then on Halloween, we all dressed up and went to a party downtown (which I only attended for like 15 minutes because dance parties with rap music are definitely NOT my scene!) Anyways, I think did the fall season justice. 
Grey's Anatomy. Yep, I am going to spend a chunk of my blog post about Grey's. Pretty much everyone I know doesn't understand why I spent most of my spare time watching this show. I'll be honest, after the musical episode and all the episodes where all these crazy, completely unlikely situations happen, I'm not sure either. But here's the thing about television and books. They heal you. In my memoir class we read this quote, "We live and breathe words... It was books that made me feel that perhaps I was not completely alone. They could be honest with me, and I with them. Reading your words, what you wrote, how you were lonely sometimes and afraid, but always brave; the way you saw the world, its colors and textures and sounds, I felt- I felt the way you thought, hoped, felt, dreamt."- Cassandra Clare. I just started reading a memoir called "Wild," and I loved the opening lines, "The mountains are tall, but I am taller." Isn't that great?  I absolutely love this because it explains exactly why I love reading, but it also explains my love for Grey's. I know it's a ridiculous soap opera, but I have loved some of the quotes from it: 

"We all think we're going to be great. And we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren't met. But sometimes, our expectations sell us short. Sometimes, the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected. You gotta wonder why we cling to our expectations because the expected is just what keeps us steady, standing, still. The expected is just the beginning. The unexpected is what changes our lives."

"At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing is reason enough to celebrate."

"You don't have to be tough every minute of every day. It's okay to let down your guard. In fact, there are moments when it's the best thing you can possible do- as long as you choose your moments wisely."

"It doesn't matter how tough we are. Trauma always leaves a scar. It follows us home, changes our lives. Trauma messes everybody up. But, maybe, that's the point. All the pain and the fear and the crap. Maybe going through that is what keeps us moving forward. It's what pushes us. Maybe we have to get a little messed up before we can step up."

"Change is a funny thing, not everyone can handle it. It can sneak up on you. Things aren't what they used to be. The whole world is transformed. You realize the ground beneath you has shifted. Things are uncertain and there's no turning back. The world around you is different now. Unrecognizable, and there is nothing you can do about it. You're stuck and the future is staring you in the face and you're not sure you like what you see."
Six Things You DON'T Need to be Happy. I found this INCREDIBLE article about things that society tell us that we need to be happy but we don't. If you read one article that I suggest, this should be it. It's awesome: http://www.thereturnedmissionary.com/6-things-you-dont-need-to-be-happy/.

I just love all these. And that's probably too much of Grey's for right now, so onto some recent pictures: 

As he walking into the MTC

Going to miss this guy for two years!

Found an autographed picture of Margaret Thatcher sent to President Hinckley!

Ellie and Linds on our Halloween cruise!

Halloween night!

Linds was a co-curator for an exhibit at the museum, so we went to see it/make sugar skulls for Day of the Dead. 

So that's it. Ups and downs. Everything. So for now, I'll leave you with this excellent live rendition of "Red" by Taylor because it is beautiful. 

"Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world."- Harriet Tubman

Well obviously Harriet was a boss woman and I loved this reminder. Sometimes we get stuck in ruts and you need to climb out of them. This quote definitely helped remind me that someday I'll be a boss woman, wife, mother, and world-traveler. Until that day, I'm just going to work consistently to make that happen! So here's what's happened recently:

• Sierra's Wedding. My aunt Sierra (my dad's sister) got married last Saturday and it was beautiful! My dad's whole extended family was there and it was really special to be able to attend the wedding. She looked gorgeous and I am so happy for her. Allen is definitely the right one for her and I could not be more ecstatic for her! It was also good to just be in Colorado and chill for a bit. I also got my big girl license, so I can now legally drink! haha not like I am going to, but I could! 
• Driving around with the top down singing at the top of our lungs/1D. A couple of weeks ago, Ellie (Lindsey's former roommate and who I hiked Timp with) invited us to go see the One Direction movie. Guys, it was fantastic!! I really love Zayn now. He's a gem, but really they all are. We then took off the roof of Ellie's jeep and drove around the canyon singing our heads out to a bunch of different songs. It was so much fun. The next week we drove around trying to figure out what song we were going to make a music video to. We didn't even start, but rest assured, that will be coming up soon! I'm glad I have at least some fun crazy college memories! :) 
• Half the Sky documentary. My DC friend, Emily, put on this presentation thing where we watched a documentary about women in the world. It was startling. I cried multiple times. It followed women from different countries like Sierra Leone, Cambodia and India. Did you know the number one cause of death for women is because of violent acts from men? That is crazy and needs to be stopped! The documentary re-awakened the idea that I am so blessed to be living in the US and that I have parents who support my education and everything I do. The numbers and the harsh reality of so many women around the world really struck home when I watched it. If you have a chance, watch it. I think it's on Netflix. And let's do something to make this situation better. I wish I had time to elaborate more on this, but seriously, there are many women in dire situations that would make you even more thankful for the circumstances you currently are in. 
• Spanish reunion. Even though I really did not want to take a language, it has been one of the best decisions I've made. Case in point: Faith and Ben. I met these two my first semester of spanish and we were all in town so we went to Cafe Rio and talked about our lives. Although it was weird to talk in English at first (we had only really talked in Spanish!), it was really fun. I am so thankful on multiple accounts that I decided to learn Spanish. I love these guys and I look forward to what great things they'll do in the future. 
•  This quote. Ever since my 12 hour journey on Timp, I've really liked quotes about hiking and mountains and such. And so I found this one on pinterest: "It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves" -Sir Edmund Hillary. How awesome is that? My whole point of attempting to hike Timp was to help me have the mental attitude that if I could hike this mountain, I could handle everything that was coming my way in the near future. Even now, even if it is a bit of a joke, when I'm doing something hard I think to myself, "Hey you climbed an 11,000 foot mountain. You've got this." 
• And this one. I have a really hard struggle, like I think most people do, to not become prideful. "Climb the mountain not to plant your flag, but to embrace the challenge, enjoy the air and behold the view.  Climb it so you can see the world, not so the world can see you.  Go to Paris to be in Paris, not to cross it off your list and congratulate yourself for being worldly.  Exercise free will and creative, independent thought not for the satisfactions they will bring you, but for the good they will do others, the rest of the 6.8 billion-and those who will follow them.  And then you too will discover the great and curious truth of the human experience is that selflessness is the best thing you can do for yourself.  The sweetest joys of life, then, come only with the recognition that you're not special."- David McCullough
• The Good Samaritan. I was recently thinking about this story after I was reading it for scripture study. I had a pretty rough emotional week last week with some personal issues and I was getting really frustrated. I read this story and came to a conclusion: we are all, at some point, all the characters in the parable. Sometimes we are the wounded on the side of the road that needs assistance. Sometimes, and probably less than it should be, we are the caregivers, the good Samaritan on the side of the road helping out our fellow men. This is the person we need to continue to work to be. This is what the gospel is all out, being the hands for our Savior. But worst of all, sometimes we're the person that helped beat up another human soul. Or we were a bystander/walked away, which is pretty much the same thing.I have loved this quote from C.S. Lewis ever since I read it in Sheri Dew's book: 

“It is a serious thing to live in a society of possible gods and goddesses, to remember that the dullest most uninteresting person you talk to may one day be a creature which,if you say it now, you would be strongly tempted to worship, or else a horror and a corruption such as you now meet, if at all, only in a nightmare. All day long we are, in some degree helping each other to one or the other of these destinations. It is in the light of these overwhelming possibilities, it is with the awe and the circumspection proper to them, that we should conduct all of our dealings with one another, all friendships, all loves, all play, all politics. There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal. Nations, cultures, arts, civilizations - these are mortal, and their life is to ours as the life of a gnat. But it is immortals whom we joke with, work with, marry, snub, and exploit - immortal horrors or everlasting splendors.”

 How often have I been the person who hurts another one of God's children? Although it was sad to realize, I loved the reminder to be nicer to people with my words and actions. It's now one of my favorite stories!

• Cuban Missile Crisis. This past Tuesday I felt more alive than I have in a really long time. For my UN class, we had a retreat up at this gorgeous mansion where we ate Thai food and then did a simulation on the Cuban Missile Crisis. I was part of the USSR and trust me, for the hour that I was participating in this simulation, I WAS Russian. It got to the point that when we finished the simulation, most of us were still mad at the "Americans." This was kind of like the simulation on the Mexican-American drug cartels that we did in DC and I loved it. It reaffirmed that I definitely need to get a degree in Conflict Resolution. It was mind-opening to see how decisions between countries ever get made because they all have separate interest and allies. I absolutely loved it! 
• Ukraine. Yes you read that correctly. UKRAINE. In a few months (i.e. April 2014) I will (hopefully) be going here:

Beautiful isn't it??

 I found out about this sort of "service abroad" called the International Language Program. I randomly found out about it from a suggested ad from Facebook. Basically I will go to Ukraine, stay with a host family and teach English for 4 hours a day at the school and then I can travel around on the weekends. It is only around the cost of tuition and it includes all of my food, lodging, flight and language lessons (that's right, I'm going to learn Ukrainian!!!). I also will be able to visit Prague (the Czech Republic), Vienna (Austria), and hopefully Hungary, Poland and Slovakia. Does this not sound like the perfect program? I'll keep you all posted about it, but I really hope I'll get in. (Yes, I did decide to do this the same semester I am applying to grad school because I am actually certifiably insane!) 

• Michal and Madison. Yesterday I had the opportunity to hang out with two of my truest, best friends in the world. It was so great to be around people who knew me either when I was younger or who just flat out knew me super well. We talked about life and our struggles and it was so cathartic. They are definitely two of the angels sent here to help me through this life. Without these two, I'm not sure I would have even made it this far. I am so grateful for the amazing friends I have! I
• Elizabeth Smart. The other day I had one of those, I am sick of school and not doing anything fun days. So I went to the bookstore and picked up a copy of Elizabeth Smart's memoir and sat and read it right there in the bookstore. Those who have known me since I was little know that one of my biggest role models growing up was Elizabeth. (Also why is it that all boss women are named Elizabeth?) Anyways, I loved having a final closure by hearing her write exactly what happened. She handled it with the utmost grace and tact without leaving out any of the truth. I absolutely admire her attitude and the lessons she taught me. That she can even be a functional human being is crazy in my opinion. She is THE most positive, loving person who loves her Savior more than anyone I personally know. I loved a few quotes especially when she said,“My mom said, ‘Elizabeth, what this man has done to you is terrible, and there aren’t words to describe how wicked and evil he is…but the best punishment you could ever give him is to be happy. Move forward and follow your dreams and do exactly what you want to do.  You may never feel like justice has been served, but you don’t need to worry about that because in the end, God is our ultimate judge, and he will make up every pain and every suffering that you’ve gone through. Those who don’t receive their just reward here will certainly receive it in the next life, so you don’t have a reason to hold on to that."'“If you relive it, you’re only allowing him to steal more of your life away from you,” she continued. “That’s the best piece of advice I’ve ever been given, and I have tried to live it every single day.” Elizabeth also said: “We always have a choice to move forward, to make a difference.I like to think that we’re not defined by what happens to us…because so many times they’re beyond our control. I like to think that we’re defined by our choices and our decisions.” Now do you see what I mean?? SHE IS A BOSS! Read the book and you won't be sorry. 
• Now onto some pictures of recent adventures: 

My aunt Sierra and new uncle Allen. So happy for them!

Laurel and I took a lot of selfies at Sierra's wedding!

Micah and Luisa (who met each other through Washington Seminar)'s wedding with some DC friends!

Seester and I!

The non-serious family photo. Laurel is a creep!

Family photo at Sierra's wedding!

Some of my boss women from DC at Luisa and Micha's wedding!

I've been listening to "Waiting in Vain" on repeat because a. it's such a good song and b. it's getting colder which means I watched Serendipity today! Watch this precious video and you'll understand why I love that movie:

Remember that one time when I went to Serendipity?? Because I do!

I LOVE love. And you all. Hope you're having a fantastic week! 

"In all things it is better to hope than despair."- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I absolutely love this quote. It's been a bit rough going on so many levels these past few weeks, but it has also been a very happy time as well. It reminds me of a favorite quote by President Hinckley: 

"Life is like an old-time rail journey—delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and thrilling bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for letting you have the ride."

Well, today especially, I am thankful for my '"beautiful vistas." One thing that has always intrigued me is the idea of opposites and how they are necessary. One of the creepiest parts of the Dark Knight Rises is when Bain asserts: "I learned here that there can be no true despair without hope." This also obviously shows up in scripture as well, but it's easier to explain using movies most of the time! :) While I was hiking Timp (which will be explained later), I realized I had two choices: sit and cry/sleep or keep going. I will be completely frank and tell you that most of my 11 hour hiked involved the former, but I did make it. I used the 'crayon' of despair and learned how hard this was and then, only then, did I have full joy (which was only about ten minutes because that's how long we were on the summit). I re-learned a valuable lesson through all my experiences this past week: I have a choice on how to react to problems. No one gets to tell me how to feel or what to do, but I am hoping that in the future, I will choose the more positive route. I can select my thoughts, and by extension, my attitude about things I experience. I fully learned the importance of experiencing both hope and despair. Now let's get onto what I did these past few (BUSY) weeks: 

• Reunion with Lindsey. Because I was in DC for Winter and Lindsey was in Thailand for Summer, I had not seen her for NINE whole months. So Marisa and I drove up to Kayesville to pick her up. We even made this cute little sign welcoming her home. Although we originally knocked on the wrong house, we were finally reunited and it felt so good! I have missed her so much while she was being a boss in Thailand. 
• The White House. No, I am not making a presidential bid! :) We moved into a new apartment called Single Tree and it is super nice minus the green hotel carpet. Marisa and I share a room, but Lindsey has a private room that looks like another "wing" of the apartment. It spiraled down to the "West" wing because it is actually on the west side of the apartment. So if you're in Provo, make sure to stop by the White House! :) This has actually been my nicest (and cheapest, crazy enough) apartment and I love it a lot!
• Climbing Mt. Timp. This little adventure begins Saturday before Labor day whereupon Lindsey invites me to go hiking with her and some friends. I find out that they're hiking Mt. Timpanogos (an 11,000+ mountain) and that they will be starting at midnight so they can summit before the sunrise so they can watch it. Although VERY leery, I agreed to hike because I thought to myself, "Hey this is my last year here and when will I ever have the opportunity to do this?" We bought these cute little headlights, packed tons of water and snacks (keep in mind that we had just fasted for nearly 24 hours because this was Sunday night) and went on our merry way. The first two hours were fun because I didn't know anyone so we shared life stories. About three hours into the the hike, I felt really nauseous because I was getting altitude sickness. Some of the group stayed back with me where we hiked really slowly. After about another hour, it started snowing and I finally threw up while some random guy I had just met rubbed my back and held my hair. So yeah, we can add that to my list of humiliating experiences. After I got sick, I REALLY wanted to just stop and take a nap because at this point, it's snowing, I'm dehydrated, it's three in the morning and I just threw up!!! One of the guys that stayed behind was a very recent RM and had that "can do" attitude that made me want to die. So basically, he didn't let me quit, but it wasn't a pleasant experience. I've only ever pulled one all-nighter and I get super emotional/grumpy when I'm tired, which added to this whole thing. So we listened to Adele and Katy Perry, I took ten minute naps in the middle of rocks and generally just took about 4x the amount of time it should have taken to hike Timp. To be honest, the night is kind of a blur. We finally summitted and I genuinely cried because I was so happy to have succeeded. But that was quickly replaced with despair because I made it to the top and there was only clouds, so we didn't even get to see a view. We stayed on top for about 10 minutes, then made our 4 1/2 hour journey back down the mountain. I'm going to be honest and say that everyone was grumpy and tired at this point. No one talked and the whole time I kept thinking to myself, "WHAT THE HECK DID I GET MYSELF INTO?" Seriously. It was not my favorite experience. At one,dramatic, point in the early morning I declare Scarlett-style, "As God is my witness, I will never hike again." I had never been more happy to see real civilization in my life. This whole experience taught me a few important lessons:

1. Never EVER EVER (times infinity) should you ever decide to yolo hiking a super steep mountain in the middle of the night after Fast Sunday. LIKE EVER.
2. I am so thankful that I was not born during the pioneer period. I would not have even made it across the Mississippi. This may sound like I am kidding, but afterwards, I genuinely prayed and gave thanks for the fact that I was not born in that time period because I cannot even imagine their pain. 
3. Sometimes, things are hard and you don't really get a noticeable reward. Usually I hate hiking but I always go because of the view. This time, I didn't get the view until much later when I was even more exhausted. I feel like that's very indicative of life.  Sometimes you work really really hard and you don't seem to get a reward at all, or it comes much later. In my case, I think my reward was that even in awful circumstances and positive friends, I can make it to the top of any mountain. (Also a HUGE shout-out to Lindsey for sticking with me when I felt like I was dying). Which brings me to...
4. I have a deeper appreciation for the talk "Mountains to Climb" by President Eyring. One of the reasons I decided to do this was because I knew if I could do this, I could survive emotional and physical trials coming my way. The good news that in the mountain of life, we have a constant buddy, our Savior, to help us through. I am so thankful for that. 
5. There are beautiful vistas like President Hinckley mentioned. When the clouds finally cleared, the view was breathtaking. I forgot (for about thirty seconds!) how much I hurt and how tired I was because the view was so gorgeous. I knew I had done something difficult and that I came out stronger. Anyways, while this adventure was not my finest moment, I am still happy I had the opportunity to climb Timp. 

• Classes. I AM A SENIOR IN COLLEGE. How the heck did that happen? As such, I am taking some pretty rocking classes: my capstone class on memoirs, Shakespeare and Brit Lit as well as my FINAL Spanish class. While I do not enjoy all the (arrogant) people in many of these classes, I genuinely love the content and my professors. It's going to be a good semester. It's only been a week and a day, but I feel like I've already been in class for a month. I am definitely getting senioritis even if I DO love my classes! :) 
• MADISON IS ENGAGED. Yep, one of my best friend's is getting married January 3 and I have the privilege of being a bridesmaid! Pretty pumped for round three of weddings! 
• Model UN. I am registered for this class and it is by far my favorite! It's a steep learning curve, but I am already loving it. I get to represent Germany, so I will know a lot about Germany and their international policies by the end of the semester. If I do well enough this semester, I'll participate in the conference in New York, which would be SUPER SWEET and a superb way to end my time here at BYU. So let's hope that happens! It is also going to teach me valuable skills like public speaking and diplomacy, both of which will help me in my grad school plans/career. 
• State Department. A woman who works for the State Department as a FSO (Foreign Service Officer) visited our UN class last week She is currently stationed in Columbia, but has been in Peru, Jamaica and is going to AFGHANISTAN in a few months. She's Mormon, married and has two kids, so basically like my dream woman, right? Well lucky for me, she stayed after and I talked to her. I ended up talking to her for about a half hour and she gave me a ton of valuable information which I will be eternally grateful for. This was definitely a divine intervention! 
• Titanic movie night. Lindsey and I have a love for Titanic. Hers is an ironic love and mine is that embarrassing unadulterated kind of love. I LOVE love. Anyways, I printed out boarding passes, we drew 'water' and the boat itself on the window and we ate. We made these pinwheels with turkey and tortillas, which was the college version of one of the courses they ate the last night. We also had pizza, pie and truffles, so we did party like we were first class. After many technical difficulties, we finally watched finished midnight with a finale of Kelsey singing "My Heart Will Go On." It was great and so much fun that we've decided to do more themed movie nights. Also did I mention that I love Titanic? Because I do! :) 
• Lindsey's birthday. Monday was Lindsey's 22nd birthday so we went to grab some Thai food and tell her why we loved her. We also bought her a gigant cupcake icecream cake which we all just ate straight out of the box (#noregrets) while listening to "22" by Taylor. So it was pretty awesome if I say so myself!
• Non-profit management. A girl in my new ward introduced herself and indicated that she was minoring in non-profit management. I instantly freaked out and was over-joyed and stayed that way... until I looked up the requirements, which are super focused on finances and accounting and not necessarily running an organization. So this is probably not going to happen, but I may decide differently in the future because I want Boss Women Unite to be a thing! 
• DC Reunion. Last Saturday morning I gathered at Tracy's for some delicious pumpkin french toast and a reunion with all my DC people. We shared what we did over the summer and it was so good to be with the people who knew me when I was my best self. They witnessed a change in who I was and it was so good to be back in an environment where everyone was kind of in the same situation. It was very refreshing and just made me miss DC all that much more.
• Meeting Sheri Dew. Yep, that happened. Every year Sheri Dew speaks to our MBA students for orientation and every year I am either too exhausted or scared to go. But this time, I had an in: my co-worker Lincoln's mom is friends with her! So I went and got to meet her. She is incredible. She asked me what my life story was and after I gave a brief explanation, she asked me what my experience in DC taught me. It was way intimidating, but so flippin' cool! She gave an excellent lecture about being a leader and I took a bunch of notes so I can incorporate them into Boss Women Unite. I am so happy that I got to meet her finally! I just want to be her!
• Plans for next year. I've been looking into doing a volunteer program through AmeriCorps Vista. Its so exciting that in less than 8 months, I can move wherever I want. I can move overseas, learn another language, basically be free of Provo forever! I can't remember if I've explained it here, but basically you volunteer for a non-profit for a year and at the end, they give you a large scholarship to help finance either grad school or pay off your undergrad students loans. I've really been looking into moving somewhere I've never been and I think I've narrowed it down to North or South Carolina. Why? Because it's super pretty and seems very calm but it's still back east. Also, it's where every single one of Nicholas Sparks' books/movies have been set and/or filmed. (Yes, that is one of the reasons I want to go there, so don't judge me!) So I'll keep you posted on my next adventures! 

Now onto some photographic evidence of said adventures:

This is Lindsey and I ON TOP OF MT. TIMP. Yes I made it to the summit!

Titanic movie night!

Sheri Dew and I!

Our Washington Seminar reunion!

From the hike to Timp.

It was (maybe) worth the hike. 

Love this girl to the moon and back!

Reunion time! We hadn't all been together in NINE months!

So that's my life. It's exciting, stressful, depressing and exhilarating. (Or as Taylor Swift would say, "I"m happy free confused and lonely at the same time"). I've also been obsessed with Celine's new song that you NEED to listen to because it is fantastic: