" We do not have to become heroes overnight. Just a step at a time, meeting each thing that comes up, seeing it as not as dreadful as it appears, discovering that we have the strength to stare it down.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt

I absolutely love Eleanor and I can't wait for the opportunity to meet her in the next life. This has honestly been one of the most stressful, emotionally imbalanced semesters of my life and this quote was my mantra because I realized that things are "not as dreadful as it appears." This semester brought a lot of changes in my personal life. Friends got married. Some left on missions. I learned how to be, at least how it felt at the time, completely and utterly alone. My brother left to serve a mission for two years. I now have two separate houses in Colorado. I applied, got accepted and then denied to Ukraine. I applied to grad school. I made new friends. I climbed to the top of an 11,000 ft. mountain, something I did not believe was possible. I figured out why I am an English major. I became enamored with Spanish. I learned to be vulnerable and accept help. I learned to believe in true, eternal love again. I realized there are angels this side of heaven that come in all forms. I became closer and relied on my Savior, allowing Him to become a friend. I was refined and can't wait to become more diamond-like in the future ;)  But most importantly, here's something I recently realized: you're not made into an incredible person if you don't have exceedingly trying circumstances. Think of all the people you admire. Did they pass through hard times? Do I really want an easy life? Aren't all the greatest people those who have faced the greatest adversity with faith and strength? I've always believed I'm extraordinary, but how do I become more extraordinary? Sitting around, leading an easy life? I don't think so. I'm reminded of President Eyring's talk, "Mountains to Climb." Without these "mountains" in our life, who is to say we'd end up half as amazing as we nearly all do? So today, at the end of this crazy semester, I just want to say thank you for my trials. After being involved with my Model UN, I've realized I have it pretty easy compard to so many other women around the world. 

In Elder Holland's talk None Were With Him, he mentions a profound point: "Brothers and sisters, one of the great consolations of this Easter season is that because Jesus walked such a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so. His solitary journey brought great company for our little version of that path—the merciful care of our Father in Heaven, the unfailing companionship of this Beloved Son, the consummate gift of theHoly Ghost, angels in heaven, family members on both sides of the veil, prophets and apostles, teachers, leaders, friends. All of these and more have been given as companions for our mortal journey because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the Restoration of His gospel. Trumpeted from the summit of Calvary is the truth that we will never be left alone nor unaided, even if sometimes we may feel that we are. Truly the Redeemer of us all said: “I will not leave you comfortless: [My Father and] I will come to you [and abide with you].” 

I loved this! The truth is, even through one of the most emotionally challenging times of my life, there WAS someone who knew exactly how I felt. He knew what it felt like to start sobbing in the RB hallway during the passing period. He knew what it felt like to say goodbye to some of my closest friends for a few years. He felt my sorrow at my personal family situation. He felt my happiness of completing the taxing task of climbing Mt. Timp. He felt my extreme joy when I realized there WERE tons of people that loved me and helped me along. Isn't it so comforting that we have a permanent best friend? 

Well to sum up my grand standing, I'll just quote another boss woman's words, "My world has changed, but I have not." Yes, that is Malala, who was shot in the head by the Taliban for wanting an education. Comparatively speaking, I have a pretty incredible life. I am so blessed. 

Now onto what's been going on in my life recently: 

Wild. So I read this incredible memoir about this woman who decided to hike the Pacific Crest Trail by herself. I loved her honesty and a lot of the things she wrote about, specifically about how she conquered her fear and things she couldn't believe she would do. Here are some of my favorite quotes from it: 

"Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave."

“Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you'll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you'll hold on really hard and realize there is no choice but to let go. Acceptance is a small, quiet room.” 

"I wasn't out here to keep myself from having to say I am not afraid. I'd come, I'd realized, to stare that fear down, to stare everything down, really -- all that I'd done to myself and all that had been done to me. I couldn't do that while tagging along with someone else.” 

“Nobody will protect you from your suffering. You can't cry it away or eat it away or starve it away or walk it away or punch it away or even therapy it away. It's just there, and you have to survive it. You have to endure it. You have to live through it and love it and move on and be better for it and run as far as you can in the direction of your best and happiest dreams across the bridge that was built by your own desire to heal.” 

One Direction dance party. When I was sitting at my apartment during Thanksgiving, ALL ALONE, it was great because I FaceTimed with my mom, siblings and also my dad during multiple points. My favorite was when Laurel, Colin and I FaceTimed a dance party. They played music in the background (mostly One Direction!) and we danced like we were in the same room, singing to each other. I'm so grateful for technology! 

Olive Garden, cupcakes and Les Mis. A couple of Saturdays ago, Ellie, Linds and I had a perfect night. We treated ourselves to a zillion breadsticks and a delicious meal at Olive Garden and then went to get cupcakes from my favorite bakery here in Provo. Then we watched Les Mis. As much as that movie is very sad, I absolutely love it. It was such a perfect evening. 

Thanksgiving/ FaceTime. Thanksgiving came and I was feeling quite sorry for myself. I thought I was independent enough to refuse people's offers to come to their house for dinner. So I worked on my paper, planning on eating my frozen Turkey Pot pie. Luckily for me, (tender mercy alert!) one of the girls from my building at work, Aimee, noticed that I was home and invited me to their ward Thanksgiving party. It was a perfectly timed invite!! I am so thankful that she invited me so I could have some company at least on this holiday. I am so thankful for her service and loving nature. I then got to FaceTime with my mom's side of the family, so that was super fun because it was like I was there. 

Eating at the hospital. You're probably thinking, what the heck is this and why is it a separate category? Well it's because apparently eating at the hospital is a cool thing to do here and I've never done it. It's been on my bucket list and Kevin and I finally went during a lunch break at work. It was like real- life Grey's Anatomy people. There were people in scrubs saying doctory things and the food was surprisingly good. I'm just glad that Kevin put up with me because I was super excited about it. (Yep, I'm a weirdo, so I'm glad my co-workers still hang out with me!) 

Be a fountain, not a drain. Every year around this time, I come up with a new goal. This next year's goal is embodied in this phrase; I am going to work harder at complaining less and instead focusing on being proactive to achieve my goals. 

Book of Mormon. I have officially read 30 pages of the Book of Mormon in Spanish! Can I just tell you how humbling it is to read the scriptures in another language? It has literally taken me 2 1/2 weeks to read that many pages! But I love it. It's incredible to read something in a different language because you are getting a different perspective. I would recommend everyone who has the opportunity to read anything in another language because it has been a great experience! 

This expert advice. Read this article if you have a chance:  http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/2012/06/15/fatherly-advice-letters/. It's all advice from fathers and I found it really tender. There are some really fantastic, succinct pieces of advice. 

Temple Square Excursion. One of my favorite things in the world, even on a regular day is Temple Square, so you can imagine my joy when they put lights on everything. I LOVE seeing the lights at Temple Square and it signals to me that Christmas is actually coming, which, during finals week, is always a struggle to remember. So Ellie, Marisa, Linds and I ate a quick bite at Chipotle (which was quick because I ate so quickly!) and then headed up to SLC. Though it was freezing, I loved it! There is not quite like the spirit you feel when you're standing on Temple Square during the Christmas spirit. We went to the top floor of the Joseph Smith building and got a great view of the whole square. It was so perfect! Then we went to Starbucks, where I discovered the existence of Egg Nog steamers. I may or may not be in love with this drink! I WANT MORE. Then, while we were driving home, we decided to try and find the house from the show Sister Wives because Ellie, Linds and Marisa love the show. After a quick Google search, we were in Lehi where we found their house. We felt creepy, but accomplished! So pretty much, it was the most perfect, magical, weirdest night in history. Perfect for the week before finals! :) 

Bridal Showers. As many of you know, my roommate Marisa and my best friend, Madison, are both getting married and I am a bridesmaid in both of their weddings. So I had the opportunity to plan and give a bridal shower. They were my two guinea pigs, but I absolutely loved planning it. I made cupcakes and planned activities and made playlists. I became quite the hostess. :) I'm sure I'll be able to tune my skills in the next few months because literally everyone is getting married! 

Mt Timp. Temple. Yesterday, I went with Madison and Mitch (her fiance) to the Mt. Timp temple because the Provo temple is closed. It's probably the last time Madison and I will ever do baptism together, which is so weird! It was really funny because we were both really confused about the flow of things were happening. The temple workers laughed at us a lot, probably because we're 21 years old and have been doing this for over 10 years and we just couldn't figure it out. It was so fun to go to a new temple and to go with my best friend one last time! SO thankful for temples and the peace it brings to my life. 

So that's an updated on my life. And now here are some pictures of my life recently: 

Michal and I outside the Vancouver temple. 

Ellie, Linds and marisa and I at temple square!

I love temple square, especially at Christmas. 

Love these ladies!

Roomie photo!

View from the Joseph Smith Building. SO GORGEOUS. 

Marisa's bridal shower!

Madison's bridal shower. 

Lindsey, Ellie and Marisa outside the Sister Wives' house. 

Laurel, Colin and I had a Facetime dance party to 1D!

 If you got to the end of this, I give you five gold starts. So that's it. Merry Christmas everyone! Love you all! 

P.S. My current obsession (i.e. my motivation for finals) is this song: